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TOTUS: White House Fence Repair or how the Stimulus Plan works!
Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House.One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence.
The Minnesota contractor take...
Dateline: 2013-05-22 11:07pm -07:00T (238 words)
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TOTUS: Girl and Cell Phone
After a tiring day, a commuter settled down in his seatand closed his eyes.
As the train rolled out of the station, the girl sitting
next to him pulled out her mobile phone and started
talking in a loud voice:
"Hi sweetheart, it's Erica , I'm on...
Dateline: 2013-05-22 4:37am -07:00T (148 words)
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TOTUS: What not to Name your Dog
Most people name their dogs "Rover" or "Tag". I called mine SEX.
This dog has been very embarrassing to me. When I took him to City Hall to get his license renewed. I told the clerk I wanted a license for Sex. He said he would like to have one...
Dateline: 2013-05-21 2:52pm -07:00T (303 words)
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TOTUS: IRS employess are here to help! And they would never act in a partisan manner.
AMERICANS SHOULD BE SO GRATEFUL THEY HAVE A PRESIDENT THAT RECOGNIZES THE IMPORTANT OF BIG GOVERNMENT. A MAN WHO KNOWS THAT MOST PEOPLE ARE UNABLE TO MAKE IT BY THEMSELVES. AND CANNOT SURVIVE WITHOUT THE AID OF DEDICATED PUBLIC SERVANTS IN WASHINGTON....
Dateline: 2013-05-20 11:52am -07:00T (142 words)
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TOTUS: A Hole Behind
A man had to go to a strange town to be the guest speaker at a business
meeting. When he arrived at the Motel in town, he found that he had a lot
of time before the meeting. He asked the clerk where the nearest golf
course was and was given direct...
Dateline: 2013-05-20 5:37am -07:00T (414 words)
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TOTUS: One of My Children
A guy is in line at the supermarket when he notices that a rather hot blonde behind him
has just raised her hand and smiled hello to him.
He is rather taken aback that such a looker would be waving to him, and although familiar he can't
place wher...
Dateline: 2013-05-19 6:07am -07:00T (172 words)
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TOTUS: The Evils of Drugs
The judge said, "You seem like nice young men, and I'd like to give you
a second chance rather than jail time. I want you to go out this weekend
and try to show others the evils of drug use and get them to
give up drugs forever. I'll see you back ...
Dateline: 2013-05-18 8:07am -07:00T (251 words)
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TOTUS: Theory and Reality
One day, this kid came home from school with a homework assignment. His
assignment: To tell the class the next day the difference between theory
and reality. He asked his father for help. "Dad, what's the difference
between theory and reality?"
...
Dateline: 2013-05-17 5:52am -07:00T (277 words)
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TOTUS: The Love of Football
There was this guy who *LOVED* football. It was his dream to go to
the super bowl. One year, he scrimped and saved and cut every corner
possible, and he was able to buy a ticket.
Unable to afford a plane ticket, he hitchhiked to the game,...
Dateline: 2013-05-15 9:52pm -07:00T (344 words)
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TOTUS: Barack Obama aka Sgt. Schultz (I see nothing)
IS THE OBAMA TURNING A BLIND EYE TO WHAT'S GOING ON AROUND HIM? DOES HE REALLY NOT KNOW, OR IS HE JUST HOPING THAT NO ONE ELSE WILL SEE EITHER. PERHAPS HE IS SPENDING TOO MUCH TIME ON THE GOLF LINKS AND AT FUNDRAISERS TO KNOW WHATS GOING ON. BUT EVEN...
Dateline: 2013-05-15 7:07am -07:00T (138 words)
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TOTUS: My Dogs Qualified for Welfare
This morning I went to sign my dogs up for welfare.
At first the lady said, Dogs are not eligible to draw welfare.
So I explained to her that my dogs are mixed in color, unemployed, lazy, cant speak English, and have no frigging c...
Dateline: 2013-05-14 6:36am -07:00T (130 words)
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TOTUS: A Marine's Tale
A MARINE WAS DEPLOYED TO AFGHANISTAN.
IF YOU WANT MORE DETAILS THAT JUST MUDDY THE WATERS GO TO ANOTHER SITE THIS IS NOT THE PLACE FOR YOU! STOP OBAMA IN 2012! GET YOUR STOP OBAMA'S SECOND TERM AGENDA WIDGET. FOLLOW LINK FOR DETAILS....
Dateline: 2013-05-13 5:22am -07:00T (43 words)
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TOTUS: Happy Mother's Day Hillary Clinton, from the Grieving Mother of a Benghazi Victim.
THE MOTHER OF BENGHAZI VICTIM, SEAN SMITH WISHING HILLARY CLINTON HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY. HILLARY RODNEY CLINTON WAS THE ONE WHO LOOKED SEAN SMITH'S MOTHER IN THE EYE,WHILE STANDING BESIDE HIS COFFIN,WHEN HIS BODY WAS BROUGHT BACK FROMLIBYA AND TOLD T...
Dateline: 2013-05-12 7:07am -07:00T (192 words)
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TOTUS: Ariel Castro, a card-carrying Registered Democrat as well as Rapist Kidnapper!
WE NOW KNOW THAT ARIEL CASTRO IS A REGISTERED DEMOCRAT. AT A TIME IN OUR HISTORY WHERE THE POLITICAL AFFILIATION OF THOSE COMMITTING CRIMES IS OFTEN EXPOSED BY THOSE IN THE MEDIA IF THEY ARE REPUBLICANS, THE SILENCE OF THE LEFT LEANING MEDIA AS TO CAST...
Dateline: 2013-05-11 1:37pm -07:00T (199 words)
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TOTUS: Stain on Hillary Clinton or was it Monica's Dress?
THERE ARE STAINS AND THEN THERE ARE STAINS. FEW THINGS STICK TO THE CLINTONS, BUT THOSE AROUND THEM ARE NOT SO FORTUNATE.
H/T TO HOPE n CHANGE CARTOONS
IF YOU WANT MORE DETAILS THAT JUST MUDDY THE WATERS GO TO ANOTHER SITE THIS IS NOT THE PLA...
Dateline: 2013-05-10 3:52pm -07:00T (64 words)
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